Why I’d Rather Wash a Dog Than My Kids' Soft Toys—The Laundry Saga Continues!

Ever tried convincing an 8-year-old that her favorite, albeit slightly grimy, soft toy needs a bath more than she does? Welcome to my world. And while we're at it, let's talk about why I end up subscribing to anything that promises to take a load off my chaotic laundry routine.

My Love-Hate Relationship with Laundry

Picture this: it's Sunday night. You think you've conquered the mountain of clothes. You’re feeling good, maybe even a bit smug, then you see it—the forgotten laundry basket in your son's closet. Suddenly, you're considering if everyone really needs all their clothes cleaned weekly.

Enter subscription laundry services—my unexpected savior. I mean, who thought paying a monthly fee to avoid laundry day drama could bring such peace? It's like Netflix but for socks and shirts.

In my experience, nothing tests your marriage like deciding whose turn it is to sort the laundry. My wife and I run several businesses together, seamlessly, might I add, but when it comes to separating lights from darks, it’s like the Cold War.

Now, don't get me started on soft toy cleaning and luxury garment care. These toys are basically family members who've seen things, spilled things. As for luxury garments, I'm convinced they're just regular clothes that read too many self-help books and started feeling all high and mighty.

The Subscription Solution

Why do I subscribe to a laundry service? Well, it’s simple:

I value my sanity, and I like to think those subscription fees are just a sanity tax—a small price to pay to avoid domestic anarchy. Plus, when it comes to uniform cleaning, I’ve seen what a teenager can do to a white shirt. It’s not pretty.

Top Reasons I Sold My Soul to the Laundry Gods

• No more 'missing sock' mysteries.
• The sweet, sweet smell of professionally cleaned clothes.
• More time to teach my kids important things, like how to make dry ice or why Nikola Tesla was the coolest geek around.
• My wife doesn’t end up doing all the work (she’s a do-it-yourself kind of gal).
• I can pretend I’m an adult who has their life together.

But let’s be real, if there were a subscription service that handled all life’s annoying tasks, I’d probably sign up twice.

When DIY Goes Wrong

Remember that time I thought I could handle all the laundry myself? Yeah, that was a fun weekend. Two flooded bathrooms and a broken washing machine later, I admitted maybe, just maybe, some things are better left to the pros.

The truth hit me hard when I found myself googling 'Is crying over spilled detergent normal?' Turns out, it’s not.

And while we're on the topic, let's not forget the time I tried luxury garment care at home. Let’s just say a certain scarf will never be the same, and now looks like something even my dogs wouldn’t play with.